What is Internal Family Systems?
IFS is a non-pathologizing, therapeutic model that recognizes the inherent wisdom in each of us to facilitate our own healing.
IFS believes we all contain many parts, each with an important role in protecting us. Some of the ways our parts protect us align with our desires for how we walk through the world, while others unwittingly create pain, suffering and stuckness. Despite their impact, we hold that there are no bad parts.
Sometimes the idea of “parts” can be hard to grasp, and the premise that we have so many of them inside of us can even be unsettling. But it may actually be more relatable than you think.
For example, have you ever been aware of a part of you that feels you should accept an invitation to do something with friends, while another part really wants to stay home, excused from the efforts of socializing? What about parts that spend many hours scrolling on Instagram, or that binge eat, or that compulsively spend money? And then the part that feels shame or judgment about those behaviors?
There’s a lot happening in there, isn’t there? It can be overwhelming, to say the least.
IFS helps us get into relationship with all of those parts by cultivating our connection to a wiser, higher Self. This resource that we might call Self, or our Wise Adult, or our Center, is present in all of us, and it has the capacity to extend curiosity, compassion and care to all parts of our inner world. As we fortify these secure, loving attachments with our parts, we begin to relate to our experience with more understanding, choice, and with a sense of inner trust and safety. What’s more, we get to know the most vulnerable parts of ourselves in a non-reactive or frightening way, and provide them the witnessing, care, and healing that they have likely been waiting for for a long, long time.
To learn more about IFS, visit the IFS Institute or check out the IFS resources below where you can further explore the model to see if it is a good fit for you.
In addition to being a trained IFS practitioner, I am also trained in Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO), IFS’s couple therapy model.
Please note, I am not a licensed therapist or social worker. I am happy to answer any questions you might have about what this means for our work together.
Podcasts:
How to Get All the Parts within You to Work Together (and with Your Partner) with Dick Schwartz | Relationship Alive
Dr. Richard Schwartz: Internal Family Systems | Voices of Esalen
IFS and All Things Couple’s Therapy with Liz Phillips | The One Inside
IFS Talks | Podcast
Books:
No Bad Parts | Richard Schwartz
You are the One You’ve Been Waiting For: Bringing Courageous Love to Intimate Relationships | Richard Schwartz